Phew for a minute there, I lost myself.....

A few days away in sunny Manchester.

No GCSE marking- hurrah! And nothing very deep (unless you count a visit to 'church'- Old Trafford football ground).....apart from last night at Old Trafford cricket ground with at least 40,000 other simple souls....

Radiohead were incredible---- highlights 'Lucky' as the light faded and an aeroplane came over, 'No suprises' and ... and.....

I'm sure MUFC and this concert were 'church' for some people.

All funded, including a superb curry by a great dentist friend of mine.... you know the picture of the Indian Holy Man wandering through a village and villagers coming out to give him food? My friend soes the same for me, except its concert tickets, cds and junk food....bliss!

That difficult 5th post.....

Ok- 5 posts in and I'm already running out of titles...

Last post for a few days: training day at school, so its a long weekend (I can't get used to weekends!). We are off to the in-laws in Manchester.

I will stay down for a bit to go to Old Trafford. No cricket sadly, but there is Radiohead, which is almost as good ( or better). Also, chance to catch up with a friend who is buying me concert tickets this year with 'head' in them (last one was Portishead).

Good quote from R.U.N. last week 'You have to smoke what you are selling'....... I have missed church- caught a trad Ang eucharist last week & hope to be at the church from which I went into Ministry this weekend...

Random things

4 things from today:-

1. Being out in Northallerton and blowing money (and enjoying it!) on a full English Breakfast...
2. Listening a lot to Bright Eyes: Cassadaga- I like 'Soul Singer in a Session Band', particularly the line 'I was a hopeless romantic, now I'm just turning tricks.'- that is why I need a sabbatical and space to recharge.....
3. Brian McClaren's 'The Church on the Other side' (he prayed for me, personally last week!!) '..there may no longer be such a thing as the learned in the new world-only learners and nonlearners.' p15.
4. Marking those things that I can't talk about- Mark 7 v34- healing of deaf-mute. Just struck me that Jesus '...gave a deep groan'...that has really set me thinking....

It's too late, more marking.....

Drinking....or working....?

When I was trying to work out what to do during this time I had a list of grand schemes and things that I would acheive. I have come to realise that in the words of the late and much missed 'Yes Prime Minister', that that is a load of CGSM (Consignment of geriatric shoe manufacturers.........geddit.....no...okay.... I'll get my coat then). Perhaps one reason why sabbaticals exist is to refocus & get rid of the idea of 'acheive'.

Ok---so what am I doing? Well, at the moment, I've not really slowed down. Last week I spent at the R.U.N. conference..... http://www.run.org.uk/R/Default.aspx (I haven't worked out how to put links in yet), of which more may follow. I've also been marking GCSE's and this is 'TOP SECRET': I have had to sign things threatening to have my tongue cut out and buried at high tide and my children sold into slavery or at the very least running the Conservative party, if I so much as breathe a word about this. So I won't. Ooops, I just did.......arrggh.

In between the lounging on a mediterranean yacht, playing roulette in St Tropez, cavorting with supermodels and heavy drinking which is what Methodist Ministers normally do on a sabbatical, I'm doing a lot of reading. I'm doing this because I like to- lots of stuff about post-church, post-modernism, post-evangelicalism, post-offices (hmmm....not sure about the latter). I thought it would be good to bounce some of this stuff off people I know well/a bit/ hardly at all/never met around some questions. And do this in 'third places' (more about this later).

These are the questions- I adapt them during normal conversation and how strong the beer is:-

1. Did you ever go to church?
2. What are your first impressions of the word ‘church?’
3. What led to you walking away?
4. What kind of church would you go to?
5. Is spirituality important to you?

Not the most original set....but I'm not original.

Last night after selflessly childminding the children until 9.30, I went out to the pub to meet Tudor (I'm changing all the names into code).

I think he is about my age- been to one of the 'Sunday Breakfasts' http://www.huttonrudbymethodist.org.uk/the_sunday_breakfast.htm and my last all-age service.

Between the beers I tested him and he looked impressed----- Ok he said 'Go away from me you weirdo, I just came here to drink'. I am pastorally trained, so I could tell this was code for 'Lead me to the Lord. Now'.

He used to go, until 14; Anglican. It was a youth club and then teengage years led him away, coupled with booze and fags. An initial response to 'church' was 'youth club'. I need to work on the other questions- or at least phrase them better. What kind of 'church' would you go to 'Don't know, really don't know'. I'm thinking that 'church' carries so much baggage that maybe its a bad word. Likewise 'spirituality', if just pitched in. The word just led to Tudor feeling 'lost' or it didn't mean anything. Either that, or it was beer...

Anyway, it was a great night. This post is too long. I do love my words. Off to mark something now that I'm not allowed to say what it is.....

I will call this one my second post....

Ok- confession time. I am a Methodist Minister and I am on a sabbatical. 'Great' people say. 'You know, I would love to have a sabbatical'. I reply to many of them- 'OK then- you can have my sabbatical and I will have your salary'. The conversation peters off then.

I started this blog as I wanted to learn how to blog and keep it up. I have my own private journal for my more private rants and reflections- this one is more public.

Why the title 'digging a lot'?

I came across this bit in the book of Hosea in the Bible recently. I don't want to say 'God told me to read this', but I had a distinct feeling of 'read it' (ie the whole book).

This was the bit:-

'Sow for yourself righteousness;
reap steadfast love;
break up your fallow ground;
for it is time to seek the Lord.

I find those words really powerful at the moment. Maybe a sabbatical is a time to do just that- break up fallow ground, dig around a bit- work out what I'm doing, attend to stuff I leave or shut out.

Hope I can do this. Someone I met last week said that in this time you tend to 'crash and burn' - you are not sure what to think or which way is up. What's more, this is usual and not to be feared.

Ok.... in between the GCSE marking (I want to relax, read, but dammit, we need the money!)... I need to phone someone and find a spiritual director/soul friend....I've been putting it off for to long.

First post

The first post. I'm supposed to have something important to say. I haven't. But this is my second go at blogging. The last one lasted 2 posts. I'm hoping this one will last a lot longer.

Back tommorrow....